It is catch-up time again.
Where have I been?
What have I been doing all month?
It may not have seemed like so much to write home about at the moment.
(Note: As you may guess, I have not used "Twitter".)
However, I recall my intention to live the moments in joy and thankfulness.
A phrase came to mind:
"The unexamined life is not worth living."
I was not sure of its author or context, so I looked it up.
Socrates.
Interesting...So I spent some time reading this and other entries.
Socrates
There is a lot there, of course.
But my connection with those words (besides, perhaps, doctor appointments/exams) is that I do want to take time to reflect, to appreciate...
and now to document.
Norman Rockwell exhibit
Early in May, John and I finally found (or took) time to attend the Norman Rockwell exhibit at the Detroit Institute of Arts (DIA).
I particularly wanted to see:
Posters to Illustrate FDR's Four Freedoms's Speech
1) Freedom of Speech
2) Freedom of Worship
3) Freedom from Want
4) Freedom from Fear
Interesting note: Commentary on the series explained that the common use of the paintings focused the meaning of the speech more narrowly than FDR intended on those in the United States, when his speech actually intended these freedoms for the world.
A while back, I had pondered Rockwell's Thanksgiving table ("Freedom from Want") painting. It seems to illustrate not only an abundance of food, but also a perfect family, an idealized family. It is the kind of picture people may compare themselves against when it seems things are wrong in their own family, in contrast to everyone else's. However, I like to use my imagination to look beneath the surface to stories of what might also be there. Whatever suffering or hardship that I know of (except "want" of course) can be imagined on their faces or in their hearts. But this day, this meal, they will put that aside to celebrate together - with whomever is there this year.
Women's Time Away
A year ago, I stayed home protecting my fragile immune system while my mom and sister attended my "mom's retreat," the overnight women's conference at Mackinac Island that my mom has been bringing us to. They said I would come next time, although I did not look much beyond each month's chemotherapy. However, as chemotherapy #9, my last scheduled infusion, approached on September 23, I asked my doctor about going and he made a point of allowing my October appointment with him to be moved slightly later. After all, I had completed my regimen!
The day came for my sister to arrive from Erie, PA to drive me up north. Instead I received a phone call that she never left town, having landed in the hospital with a heart attack.
Who can explain this story, but my mom was in the hospital the same day - only in northern Michigan!
I just drove up to be with her. However, her doctor allowed her to leave and to go to the island. So we attended the retreat and had a good time. However, my mom was very tired, and it was not the same without my sister.
So, now, by the spring retreat, the anticipation had really built. We were finally all going to be healthy, and enjoy ourselves together! And we did!
It is good to have something to look forward to, and for us it was the Win-Some Women conference. Bonnie arrived at my house Friday, May 8, when we celebrated John's birthday (as we would be missing the actual May 12 date). We walked around my neighborhood, and I showed her places I had discovered while sometimes also talking to her on the phone. We also got food at one of my favorite places, The Inn Season Cafe. Bonus: Bonnie liked it too!
According to my memory, this was my first adult Mother's Day with my mom! As it turned out, John also spent time with his mom back in Dearborn! A good day!
I sometimes say that mostly what we do on Mackinac Island is sit and eat. We also listen.
Bishop Eugene Sutton (Episcopal) spoke about prayer, contemplative listening prayer in particular. He said that prayer is not the opposite of action (as in "there is nothing left to do"), but rather a prerequisite. It assumes a relationship where you invite the Creator Holy God into the core of your being, to see what you would rather leave unseen. There is a silence where we know God does the work, and we are participants in that work.
"Renounce your image of God.
Allow God to be who God is,
rather than who you need God to be."
(Cassian, I think)
Sutton also called on an old proverb in an interview I found:
"If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go with others."
Karen Covell spoke about praying for those in the media instead of boycotting or hating. She is a television producer, and began an organization called Hollywood Prayer Network to encourage that connection, calling Hollywood the "world's most influential mission field". She also encouraged the audience to consider their own "mission field", and making a difference where they live. Interesting concepts.
Over-lapping Scheduling
John left for Annual Conference (for work) the morning that Bonnie and I arrived back in Royal Oak.
I often used to attend those when we went to Albion and later to Calvin College.
They were like a kind of family reunion.
Time with James
While John was gone, I also had a bit of time with James.
We walked up to a new Vietnamese restaurant in Clawson, called Da Nang.
We got rained on, but it was worth it!
Why I Cry
I do not remember crying when I found out I had cancer.
Nor do I remember really crying much since, because of the cancer.
I may have tears at poignant movie scenes.
However, sometimes, tears come unexpectedly.
Who can explain these things?
Twice this month...
My Garden
Several weeks ago, a man came to our door to report on his company's service on our lawn.
He noted for the record that they would stay clear of any applications near our little garden area in the backyard, and that we could switch the service to an organic version. I thought that was later done, but a few weeks after that, I woke up to a notice on the door that the lawn had been serviced again. I started to look up the chemicals online. What if my garden were contaminated? What if I could not have it this year? What if...? I called, and the company said the garden should be fine. The tears passed.
Newspaper Hero Story
The second time tears came this month was when I read an article in last Sunday's Detroit Free Press called, "Heroic Teen Followed In Hero Dad's Footsteps" by Jeff Seidel. Katrina Wert of Reed City and her dad Master Sgt. Michael Wert both risked their lives to save two strangers in the dangerous rip-current of the Atlantic Ocean off North Carolina. The boys were saved. Katrina brought them in. Her father died. In pain and alone, the family moved back to Michigan, where Katrina eventually decorated her wall with quotations, such as "I intend to live forever. So far, so good."
Stealing Buddha's Dinner
by Bich Minh Nguyen
Enough tears. On May 19, I read articles in both the Detroit Free Press and the Grand Rapids Press announcing the coming-of-age memoir by a former Grand Rapids resident and immigrant from Vietnam as the 2009-2010 "Great Michigan Read". "Michigan Read encourages state residents to read the same work of literature." So I quickly checked out and read the copy from my local library, of course! I enjoyed reading familiar names and places, and also her abundant food imagery.
Weapon of Mass Reduction
The "Waistnipper"
I made a new purchase in my continuing effort to protect the post-surgery (weakened abs) hernia just above my navel. It has 14 sets of hooks-and-eyes.
Yard Angels
Last weekend Kathy and Bill arrived at my house again.
Last year, they had already worked more hours than I know to co-create with God a place of beauty.
Kathy stayed for hours, bringing more color and life to the space around us.
Mostly pink, against a dark mulch.
Mmmm. Lovely and peaceful.
I helped a little (and chatted and distracted her more).
Learning: Faithfulness of a Gardner
One day, I noticed our little garden plot of earth was almost covered with a wonder of nature, maple tree seeds/helicopters/darts.
I had thought I might try a wait-and-see approach.
Surely they would not all take hold and grow.
Maybe I could just pull out the shoots that might come up later.
But experienced gardeners advised against that approach, saying too many would come, and the results would be overwhelming. Better to catch them early.
Really?
Because there are a lot, and would take time.
So first John got a leaf-blower and went at it.
A good first-sweep.
But then I started picking them out, one by one, by hand.
A quiet contemplative time.
I thought about what fills our lives, that it is important to not let something that does not belong there to have a chance to take hold and grow
And just when I thought that my weeding job might be good enough, I thought:
"How many cancer cells would I be willing for Dr. Malviya to have left in me?"
And I kept weeding.
Now to let it digest so I can plant.
Carrie Is Coming!
Today, Carrie is flying in for a quick visit!
We will make a quick over-night trip up north to celebrate my dad's birthday.
So much to do!
So much to celebrate!
